she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize