stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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