Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Such a big mess for such a small penis
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize