He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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