i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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