There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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