In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
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We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
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We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
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