I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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