at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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