Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize