we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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