they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize