i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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