You made me cry and you don't even care
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize