Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Randomize