hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize