I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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