So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
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some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
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Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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