that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize