there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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