wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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