what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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