Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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