I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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