Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize