I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize