Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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