Dual....:-)
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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