My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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