coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one acquire holy water?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize