We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
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I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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