I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
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2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
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I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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