Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
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