i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize