I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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