It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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