How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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