Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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