So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize