when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
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Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
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If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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