escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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