We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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