Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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