Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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