I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize