I got chris browned last night
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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