Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
jump out the window naked night went bad
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