I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
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