there's paper in my vomit.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize