My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
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We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
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I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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